My daughter is snuggled up against me, loving me for everything I am, and everything I am not yet.
At 2, she just loves me “so much.” She constantly shows a deep faith that I love her and will keep her safe. Sprouting from this faith is a deep trust that allows me to lead her, and sometimes push her, out into the world. Sometimes she says the obligatory “no,” yet her eyes always convey her deep attachment.
Over the last few years, I have gone from someone who has been hijacked by shame to living a lightness I can only explain as God’s Grace.
My reliance on God has gone deeper, moving from my head into my heart. Or rather, my head no longer blocks and limits my heart.
When I “look at” God, I feel as if I am my daughter looking at myself, in a way. I love God so completely and trust God so much, that I know God will keep me safe even as I am pushed out into the world.
And out of this, a weird paradox is pulling me back into my head.
As my faith grows deeper and I become more “bible based,” I notice that I am becoming even more accepting of other ways of getting “there”.
Simply put, the more I believe being a Christian is the right thing for me, the right path for me to follow, the only path for me to follow – I believe that following another path within Christianity or even outside of it may be the right thing for someone else.
God forbid! Right? (I’m sure some are reading this and deeming me non-Christian or a Universalist.)
Yet how do I know what God has in mind? I do not know what God has in store for myself, let alone someone else…so how can I judge God’s Plan?
One concept that appears repeatedly in the scriptures is that God doesn’t reveal the whole plan to any individual at any particular time. Even the prophets didn’t get the whole message – the whole future. God let them know just enough to do their work.
God gives me just enough to keep me going…and sometimes all I get is the knowledge that God “came through” before, so I have faith God will again.
Just as my daughter doesn’t understand everything about who I am, or why I am encouraging her to ask questions before pouring chocolate milk back-and-forth between cups on the family room carpet, I look towards God for direction, knowing that I only have a tiny bit of “all this” figured out.
I trust God to get me where God wants me to be, knowing that it is often the journey through the desert or the time in a faraway kingdom, that will get me there.
Gracious Lord, help me trust You with my journey and the journey of others. It is difficult when the path is not clear, but Lord, You know where we are and where we are going. Help me trust You with the whole map, as I focus on the immediate steps before me. Amen.