Prayer for Guidance

Gracious God,

I feel your presence.
I hear your voice.
Yet, I still do not understand.

I yearn to act upon your call.
but what is your call?

Could you send an angel to speak to me as I sleep,
or a vision that comes in a warm light?

Am I that different from Deborah or Elizabeth?

I pray.
I am still.
(or as still as can be)
I go about my days and nights,
caring for your creation as best I can.

I read your Word.
I do my best to understand it,
trying to make sense of a time way before mine,
circumstances no one now can fully decode.

I search your Word.
I let it sit on my heart.
I let it simmer in my veins.

Yet what I know,
others say is wrong.
What I breathe,
others say is not the way.
But – what they find in the end,
I find too,
just by a different way.

I seek to follow your path,
wherever it may wander.
I am open to be stretched,
and tugged,
and divided,
and proven wrong.

I seek You out,
as You have sought me out from the beginning.
Yet, unlike you,
I get lost,
and distracted,
and doubt.

Perhaps that is just it.
Perhaps the doubt, the distraction, the getting lost,
is part of the path.
To be reassured in the midst of confusion.
To be called to continue to seek.
To be in full reliance on you,
and not what others,
or what I, think.

Lord, show me the way.
Lord, show me Your way.
For only Your way, God, is the right,
and ours is only a wandering, wondering guess.

Amen.

Postscript:  This prayer came from frustration with writing a  post.  I find writing as the primary way for me to work things through, yet writing for public consumption and writing in my journal are two very different things.  I have been keeping journals since elementary school, yet the formality of posting is something extremely helpful at this point as its limitations force me to think differently.  In this case, out of my frustration, I am brought back to God – how perfect, huh?   In the midst of writing the prayer, I was distracted with getting my kids to bed, and in the midst of this “distraction,” I received the answer to my prayer.  The answer was a challenge and a prodding, but it settled into my heart quickly, putting me at peace and a new sense of excitement.  God’s Way is not easy and we, as limited fallible human beings, are unable to see it in its entirety  yet sometimes we are blessed with a tiny glimpse.  May you today see a glimpse of God’s Way yourself.

About SFriant

A mom and wife trying to live deliberately and spiritually in a crazy world.
This entry was posted in Prayer, Spiritual Practice, Spirituality - Spiritual Journey, Theology, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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